Having accidentally run out of toilet roll this morning, Im now considering the merits of using Tescos Value kitchen roll as a full time alternative. OK, there are no puppies on the roll and it doesnt come in subtle pastel shades. However, it seems to offer the following advantages: (1) Its cheaper. (2) It has no real difference in softness. (3) Judicious folding means you can get a fair bit of mileage out of one square. (4) Its thickness almost guarantees that Im not going to subject myself to my usual sudden autounerotic fisting.
Watch this space. Before long perfect housewife Anthea Turner will be singing its praises. You heard it here first.
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On the subject of Anthea Turner…