When I was a little lad I used to love watching Will Hay films like Oh Mr Porter! The Ghost of St. Michaels, Ask a Policeman and Windbag the sailor. They seemed to hold a flickering romance that captured my imagination. Now thanks to the engineering wonder that is the Whirlpool bath and three quarters of a bottle of Radox Green Tea Infusion bubble bath, I have been able to re-live the film Wheres that fire? In that film Hay, Moore Marriott and Graham Moffat played firemen who attempted to fight fires using a machine that created a massive quantity of soapy bubbles, choking so much oxygen from the air that the flames were smothered.
Im not going to stop there. Tomorrow, using little more than a couple of Tescos chicken breasts, a pair of crotchless panties and a copy of British MILFs: Down and Dirty vol. 5 Im going to have a crack at creating Kelly LeBrock c. Weird Science in the kitchen microwave.
Watch this space Magnus Pyke and Adam Hart-Davies.